Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Game 101

Let's discuss Game, shall we.

I'm sure this is a conceited thing to say but i've never been on a date wherein I wasn't in complete control. That is to say in a contest of who had more game...the obvious answer was me.

Tonight I met my match. In fact I am certain that I was outgamed, out thought, out impressed. In a land of dreamers and wannabes I'm a successful young woman with all her own, I need not from any man. But tonight, tonight I was the one who was impressed, I was the one who was thrown off her game, the one shook. Shook. I was actually shook.

Anyhow-I had a great date with the restaurant conceptualist, and older men may in fact be for me...forget about these young men...lead me, show me something new, kind sir.

Sunday, May 25, 2008

Bianca my Belle...

Everyone knows I love LA. I also love my car and driving. Generally having a car in LA is sometimes problematic. I could never say that I hate driving in this city, but there are definitely times that driving in LA is more of a burden then a pleasure.

Last night was not one such time.

Not many people were out, no police were out...it was perfect. I drove fast just because, I raced ppl who thought they could keep up, I weaved between cars just because I could. It was beautiful. Just driving around town I forget how powerful Bianca (my car) is, I forget that she is in fact a race car. Last night it all came back to me.

I feel back in love with my car again last night...she is the ultimate driving machine. I am forever a German engineering kinda girl.

Saturday, May 24, 2008

Dagblasted Fresno...

Something about being in SF makes me feel the need to blog...maybe its the being in a new place feeling like I'm on a quick mini vacation.

Anyhow I got up at 3:30 this morning. Three-Thirty in the am...umhmm the same time that I'm often getting home is the time I had to get out of the bed this morning. Even my dog was like yeah you're on your own with all that waking up business, she looked up at me, then turned back around in her doggy bed.

I managed to get myself put together pretty quickly-due to elaborate preparation from the night before, every article of clothing laid out for me to put on, hair curled the night before, simple makeup thrown in my purse, I cannot be asked to think that time of morning. Out the house by 4 at the airport by 4:15, and sitting at my gate by 4:40. Clearly I overestimated the various lines to get into LAX for my 6am flight. So I passed the time ppl watching and talking to my parents.

After discovering that the flight is delayed, I'm chatting with the girl next to me about how I'm going to Fresno, she queries about why I didn't just fly into Fresno-"what!!?? There is an airport in Fresno, they told me I had to fly to Oakland! This is what happens when I don't do my own research." I am indignant. Then she mentions that the train I'm planning on taking to Fresno doesn't go that far. I hear her talking but she seems dingy so I'm not all that concerned, plus "they" told me that the train took them to Fresno for court just a couple weeks ago.

After the delay I arrive in Oakland at 8:10, I'm supposed to be in court in Fresno at 9am. I ask the first rent-a-cop I see at the airport whether it'll be quicker to take the train to Fresno or a cab. He looks at me and is like do you know how far Fresno is from here. I say no, but think to myself-if I knew the answer to that would I be asking you this question. He then explains while laughing at me that the train absolutely does not go to Fresno, that I couldn't have seen that online, and that I would never make it for my 9am appt. Bullocks! Being that I planned out this trip yesterday, looking online to see where the train would drop me off vs. where the courthouse was I could not fathom that I could have been so misdirected (read: wrong). So I persevered on, despite the rent-a-cops kind albeit mocking/kidnappy assertion that if he were getting off from work he'd take me on the 2 hour drive to Fresno himself, to the information counter grabbed a train map and hoped on the bus to the train-either way I had to get on the train b/c the only other plan for today was to have lunch with my girlfriend and she was in SF which is Definitely on the train route. I sit down on the bus break out the train map and sure enough no Fresno anywhere-oh crappity, crappit, crap. I break out my detailed plans that I obtained from the trusty internet yesterday and confirm-yep I'm supposed to be on Park Paseo Dr. FREMONT, CA at 9am.
Dang.
Fremont.
Lo and behold Fremont is clearly a train stop, doesn't have an airport and I'm an idiot working off of little sleep.

My colleague informed me that the train stop to court was a good little walk, the internet confirmed its about a half mile, and while granted that is walkable. I am not that kinda girl, so I call ahead to have a taxi meet me there. Besides the flight delay set me back timewise and I did not have the time or patience to be trying to hoof it. I get in the cab and tell him where I'm going in his thick middle eastern accent he informs me not so nicely that the courthouse is right on the corner...no one takes a cab to the courthouse b/c its so close...its just right there...ppl normally walk...its not a long walk...
I finally informed him-i am not ppl, the two lefts and one right turn he made indicate it is NOT on the corner, and most importantly I didn't want to walk! Sheesh. Can't a girl take a cab in peace!

I hadn't missed my case which was great, sat in court for literally hours! Finally finished that and headed back on the train to SF. This big guy sat behind me. I love the big boys don't get it twisted but I should not be able to hear you breath as if you are breathing in my ear after a long run around the block from a rabid dog and his murderous kkk owner.

Get to SF, and am standing in front of my girls job, which is apparently the only non sex shop on the street. Convenient for someone I presume. While waiting on the street for her to come down, apparently moved by all the adult toys around me I literally showed my behind to some unsuspecting little asian man. Yeah he saw my full, bare, bum. I forget that SF is not LA, a flirty little lightweight skirt will get blown over your head or up to your chest in my case...just ask the unsuspecting asian man.

We had a great lunch and I managed to keep my no-no parts to myself for the rest of the afternoon-which was no small feat.

Per usual SF was fab. Too bad I didn't get to shop. My friend and I vowed that the next time I came we would get a hotel and spend some time drinking and chillin-the girl knows me what can I say.

Sunday, May 18, 2008

Be careful what you ask for...

Men.

Sigh.

My girlfriend asked for a hot guy, great body, just someone to share her bed with, he didn't even have to talk. What she got was a very, very sexy chocolate man, great body, and dumb as a bag of rocks.

I requested a big backed, baller, charming, bossy etc. Basically all the usual things that I look for (you know since its been sooooo sucessful for me in the past) in a man. What I got was all those things, literally a back to write home about, unimaginable swagger, flossy car etc. Also, he's a stripper. Not just any stripper, but according to all the black woman that I've talked to about him, he is the Jay-z of strippers in LA. My life is hilarious. There is only one all black male strip club in LA and he is apparently the headliner at said club. Nearly every single woman that I've mentioned his name to, at the shop, my book club, friends from highschool, the ladies at the revival I went to (ok, just kidding about the last one), all of them knew EXACTLY who I was talking to at the mere mention of his name. I could just imagine going out in public on a date with this gentleman...again my life is funny. And clearly I need to be more specific with my requests.

A new restaurant opened downtown, its lovely, great food, and the owner has a back that seems to be cut out of rock. He's very nice, but i'm convinced that something has to be wrong with him. I just mean b/c of my track record it would only make sense that he has something horribly wrong with him.

Today my little brother, who for whatever reason is desperate for neices and nephews, had a showcase performance. Apparently the local chapter of the NAACP has a talent competition for kids and my little brother won first place in classical singing. Yeah you read that right, classical singing. I had no idea that he did that...I was certain that he was going to be singing some Chris Brown, maybe a little Brian McKnight if I was lucky. Anyhow, I arrive there to discover that the gentleman leading the meeting is incredibly handsome, like beautiful. My stepmom leans over to me and asks, "so you want to join the NAACP", I replied, "no I'm good". A few moments later, a second possibly even more attractive big backed man walked in and I leaned over to my stepmom and said....do you have a membership application on you? My brother then decided that dude #2 and I should start seeing each other (surprisingly the boy has good taste) and proceeded to crudely "introduce" us, and give dude the "holla at her" eyes. My little 16 yr old brother hooking me up. I couldn't pick between them, they were both articulate, smart, funny, handsome, big backed. So I just played it cool with both, and gave them both my card in case the organization could use my services...you know I am giving that way. We'll see what happens.

The exes are still hanging around. They should form a club. The sometimey club. They could have meetings to discuss ways to reenter and then abruptly leave my life. It'd be fun like a little social club.

Sigh.

Men.

Monday, May 12, 2008

Been too long...

Gosh April 13th was the last time I was on here. My, my that was a long time ago.

Well hello there, all.

Things are going well. I can't complain.

The trip to St. Marteen is on and poppin. I'm super crunk about it. So crunk that I've given up carbs in preparation and turned to cooking. And guess what...I'm a pretty good cook!!! Turns out my family cooking gene, from both sides, did get passed down. Who knew! My sister said it looks like I'll make someone a good wife after all. Me? A good wife?! Forreal?! Pretty much I still can't see cooking every night, that business is exhausting. But i'm pretty good at cooking multiple things at the same time, so all cooking takes place on Sunday and must last all week.

Also, I am never going to a hetero club again. My co-workers brother came into town from Chicago and since he is gay we took him to our favorite homo club-the abbey. Apparently that was my night, apparently I have never nor will ever look that good again. I love compliments from gay men, they are the most pure compliments you can get from a man. He doesn't want me, and likely knows more about fashion, hair and makeup then I can ever hope to learn. So after hearing that I was georgeous about 12 times (which is exactly 11 more times then i've ever heard it at a hetero club) I made the decision that the gays are in fact for me. Now if only I could do something about all the techno...if we could resolve that I might move into the abbey. Of course there is also the issue of how to deal with the lesbians...

Just finished a great book about a mother daughter relationship gone wrong. It was interesting to read about the dynamic when the mother spent most of her daughter's life as an alcoholic. The book is Orange, Mint & Honey by Carleen Brice. I recommend it.

I also recommend this chick Adele from Europe, is it just me or does Europe put out the best blue eyed soul these days.

My little brother asked to use my car for prom in a couple weekends. Just the thought of it makes me tense up. I have to check my insurance coverages before I can even think about it. I'm scared not only for my car, ok mostly for my car, but also that he'll wrap the car around a tree and kill his fool self. And then I won't have a car...and one less brother. Who I obviously love dearly. :)

That's all I got for now...but good to see you all again...been too long.