Wednesday, April 01, 2009

As promised...

Its the first day of April. My life has changed so much since last April....in some respects for the better in others for the worse, I guess I'm just breaking even, which isn't the worst thing.

I guess I wonder if I've progressed at all. Am I better then I was? Have I grown or developed, matured?

I think I've become more honest with myself. I'm better able to internally articulate my feelings to myself-clearly I've always known how I felt but I wasn't always honest about why. There were lots of, "I don't know why I do/say/act up like that", when really I did know I just couldn't bear to say it aloud. But is being able to honestly assess helpful or important without action?

Anyhow this wasn't intended to be an introspective post. There are actually some good things happening in my life. I got a new job!!! Yay. And I'm honestly scared of it which I'm looking forward to. It's actually going to be challenge. I will have to figure out things b/c they must be figured out and not b/c I have to pad or bill my hours. How novel is that. Its a risk, and a leap but in this legal market why not? There's not some other more wonderful option that I can think of. So I'm gonna step up and step out on a bit of faith that this will work. Its exciting.

I've been in this strange wanting/needing companionship space. I actually considered for a whole couple of minutes letting my law school ex take me on a weekend get-a-way. Why, you ask? B/c I wanna at least play boo'd up for a weekend, do some couply stuff, be pampered and hopefully get this desire out of my system. But then I snapped back to reality....I can't go nowhere wit that fool.

I've been on this total eating healthy/work out kick. I'm really proud of myself-exercising everyday is a totally new addition to my life. It's kinda nice. My body feels good. I plan to have a killer body by summer, or fall, or winter...basically however long it takes. I've even discovered how to exercise regularly and maintain my press!!! Its incredible I know. My hair is not dumb fly like it usually is, but its still fly and not as puffy as one would expect. Be prepared though, if I get my 21 year old body back, you won't be able to tell me nothing, nor will you likely be able to stand me. Sorry. I apologize in advance.

Seriously...

I am so overdue for a new post...like seriously.
And one will come, but jeez do I feel busy-stretched to the max. There is just too much to do and not enough hours in the day to do them. "This can't be life"-Jay-z just popped into my head.

JAC-I wish I did have a dude offering to take me on a trip, regardless of how long i've known him, right about now i'd probably go. :)

Anyway I just wanted to make sure that you all knew I was still alive and kicking, just trying to get a handle on this unweildy thing I call my life.

In due time, kimosabe, in due time.

AI-Top 9

What are we on now? 9 people? Paula now loves a tutu-or at least tutuish dress.

How boring for them to have to go visit Ryan at work..that seems lame.

Anoop-Two lines into the song and i'm dancing. The vocals are just ok. maybe a bit better then ok...this jacket is distractingly stupid. And he was making some pretty ugly faces at one point, for what reason i'm not sure. I love that when Kara mentions frat boys, they cut to anoop's friends=frat boys. lol. What do they want him to do, i'm confused? Vocals were good, but....what, what do they want him to do?

Murderer of the greats Megan-I could cry that she is singing this song...I'm staring at her trying to figure out how or at what point ppl thought she could sing. She can't sing. And i haven't heard a time that she actually sounded great...she should have never been on here, in the first place. There isn't a song that she has sung that fits her voice, b/c....get ready for it...SHE CAN'T SING.

Danny-This is a great song for him. I appreciate that he knows his strengths, he understands what songs he glows on. And as usual he sounded amazing. but i doubt that he changed it all, he probably sung it just like it is on the radio and elsewhere...and thats what irritates me. Kara is always talking about artistry, when the reality is, if you can sing any song you sing will sound like yours, it is about singing.

Allison-Why is she playing guitar? Loathing her hair..its bringing out rage in me its so bad. But the lovely opening to the song are you kidding, her vocals sound incredible. She went back to her regular for the chorus, but the opening was gorgeous. Randy is right she looks like a crazy person, but doesn't she always?

Blind Scott-he loves a slow relatively boring song/performance. This will not turn things around, b/c it will be boring. I can't figure out if i love or hate his hair...oooh just saw his face directly and nope I hate it. He looks like a strange 90's character, like kirk cameron's evil blind cousin from the Seaver household.

Matt-this pimple in the middle of his forehead...its really bothersome, can't someone do something about it? He wants so badly to do this mild rock, and the judges and the rest of us want him to do R&B, b/c he actually has the voice for it...this song he is singing, you don't have to be able to sing to sing it...they want him to sing singers songs, R&B you monkey. Why can't he figure that out? It was exactly like that Coldplay night! But its what he wants to do, for some strange reason.

Lil-I'm scared. I love the hair. I like this dress (except for all the backshots they kept giving us). She didn't sound terrible, she sounded pretty good. But i agree with simon that it was a song done to stay in the competition. That was cute for Ryan to be genuinely caring when he noticed that she was crying.

Adam-with play that funky music and his dance moves, and Eddie munster hairdo. This reminds me of a drag queen performance, i could totally see him dressed beautifully as a woman doing this performance. He relies a bit too heavily on that falsetto screaming yell note thingy. But that was fun. Is paula reading this critique? That was so scripted. But he could totally be a Munster, he just needs more of a widows peak.

Chris-I love this song, i hope he hasn't screwed it up...WOW. I am really impressed. That was really awesome. He is gonna have a big career. And in the end of the competition when its down to him and Adam, America will choose him b/c you can't get more American then Chris.

If Megan doesn't go home tomorrow....it will be a travesty of justice!