trains of thought

...someone paid me a great compliment the other day, she said that I was the only person she knows who can go from bourgeois to ghetto in the blink of an eye. she said that lots of ppl that she knows are able to switch it up but not as quickly or effortlessly as I do. I love that about me! is that vain to say? its one of my favorite qualites about myself, versatility. I love that i can go to a meeting of professional collegues and contribute intelligently to the discussion, and leave there and head to a venue where they play Pharcyde's "Passin me by" or Tupac's "I get around" and I know all the words, or Lil boozie's "wipe me down" and I know the chorus (ignorant songs I try to keep it to chorus only). Or sing along to Chamillionaire's "Ridin' Dirty" but am also well informed and have strong opinions regarding police profiling in my community. The fact that the other night while watching the video's that I DVR'd from BET, I had to get up and dance hard because the beat dropping in on UGK's "International Players Anthem" gets me every time, but I can also put together a cogent argument for why BET is the bain of my people's existence (and I use the word bain) is great stuff.
I tend to think that in my generation there are many like me. there are obviously those that stand only on one side or the other, but i think that there are many that straddle the line and exist in both realms without feeling conflicted or disingenuous.

...we are going through a bit of a rough patch. all of us. at the same time. its strange. i love how we are all relying on one another though. how we all have turned to our faith, and the bible for strength and fortification. its funny though, when things are swell we don't talk this much about the bible. isn't that always the way, when things get bad is when we turn in earnest to Him, of course we think about him and thank him in passing when things are good as well, but we re-commit, re-focus all our attention on Him, when things take a turn for the worse. i'm happy that we are all here for each other. i pray for us, in hopes that our various situations and stressors will pass and that in the meantime we don't give in to our disquieting thoughts.

...last night at the kingdom hall a brother that has recently been in the hospital for his heart, passed our towards the end of the meeting. his wife screamed, the meeting stopped, ppl hurried to his side, the paramedics were called, the meeting ended abruptly, ppl were silent. no one wanted to leave until the paramedics verified that he was ok. he is an older brother, probably close to the neighborhood of 70 years old, he got married about 3 years ago, for the first time i think. they are an odd couple, but they clearly make each other very happy, she has softened his often cantankerous nature. For her sake, almost more then his, I hope he is ok. To have finally found a measure of happiness and then to have it taken away abruptly (or slowly) while not uncommon to the human condition, is cruel nonetheless.

...2 Timothy 3:1-7
"1But know this, that in the last days perilous times will come: 2For men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, 3unloving, unforgiving, slanderers, without self-control, brutal, despisers of good, 4traitors, headstrong, haughty, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, 5having a form of godliness but denying its power. And from such people turn away! 6For of this sort are those who creep into households and make captives of gullible women loaded down with sins, led away by various lusts, 7always learning and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth."
I have read 2 Tim 3:1-5 a million times. like literally a million times...but vs. 6, 7 I think i read it for the first time over the weekend. I can't ever recall reading it before, and it clicked for me...I've often wondered how the significant others in the lives of my friends and I could be so cruel, so deceptive, how their actions could belie such contempt and wholesale disregard for the feelings of those they claim to care about...the scripture explains it. Its the last days...

...Credit cards are the bain of my existence. I loathe them.

...My parents brought home videos from when I was a kid on vacation...I was 7 years old, adorable, articulate, and had a disproportionately large behind for my small frame. its the craziest thing, but it does look hilarious, i totally get why the kids made of me.